Mapleaks shares an audio leak from Canadian Food Inspection Agency, re beef recall

Listen (1’39”) while following the transcript below


Mapleaks, the strong Canadian arm of WikiLeaks, circulated an audio leak from the Canadian Food Inspection Agency, in regards to the biggest beef-recall in the Canadian history.  It is my understanding that the audio file was firstly sent to a handful of amateur Canadian podcasters, as they were trusted more than traditional media such as CBC Radio.

It is a classified telephone conversation between a group of concerned (yet confused) Canadian organic cows, and a CFIA call-center officer.

Mapleaks provided the transcript as well, a meritorious work, given the scarcity of fluent Chinglish-Cowglish translators.

Download mp3: Mapleaks CowInterview

** **


CFIA Agent: Canadian Food Inspection Agency! … (unintelligible Chinglish, along the lines of who the heck is calling on a Friday night just before closing)… Hi!

Cow 1: We’re a group of concerned Canadian cows. Can we ask you a question?

CFIA Agent: Yes, go ahead.

Cow 2: We are petrified by the E. Coli story.

CFIA Agent: So you’re kind of Consumer or Business?

Cow 3: Definitely consumed.

CFIA Agent: OK, may I see the province you’re calling from?

Cow 1: Mu-albertaaa.

CFIA Agent: OK, and what is your question?

Cows: We are worried that E. Coli is going to kill us.

CFIA Agent: You want to know if E. Coli is deadly for the cow?

Cow 1 (really frightened now): Yes!!!

CFIA Agent (lost): Aaaaaa … let me see, can you hold on?

Cow 1 (in a rare nostril dialect of Cowglish, while chewing comfort food):  A critical question for our race and he puts me on  hold …

CFIA agent: Thank you for holding. So the informations we have here do talk about E. Coli that could be deadly, some people may die through it; we’re talking about people with weak imune system or children that would be contaminated with food…

Cow 1: Stop talking about people! I asked you about COWS!!

CFIA Agent: There is no specific that says that this would be deadly for the cow.

COWS ALL TOGETHER: Yeeeeeessss!!! Say it again, I put you on speaker!

CFIA Agent: … no specific that says that this would be deadly for the cow.

COWS ALL TOGETHER: Yes!!!!!! Say it again, human!

CFIA Agent: … no specific that says that this would be deadly for the cow.

COWS ALL TOGETHER: (banging out the doors, in a sprint to spread the good news)

CFIA Agent: OK, thank you, bye.

** End of transcript** ** Confidential** ** Do not copy **

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